Monday, August 21, 2006

#7: Eru's Big Joke

Date: Before the Beginning of Time
My Mood Is: grousing

Alright, let me finish my story. So Eru embarassed Melkor, which just seemed gratuitous and unnecessary to me. Melkor didn't do anything he wasn't asked to do.

Then Eru called us all over the the Edge of the Void. I was afraid the big guy was going to do something rash, like throw Meklor into the Void or something. I have to admit, I was kind of hiding behind Huan at that point -- I was one of the instigators of the trouble, after all.

But Eru gestured into the Void, and called out "Behold your Music!"

Then a world appeared. An entire freakin' world!

It was absolutely amazing. All the colors -- color had never even existed before! And sound -- no, the Music of the Ainur is not "sound," what would the sound travel through? Air doesn't exist! The sounds of the world were mesmerizing. And the smells, and the feelings -- the heat and cold and the wind.

There is never ANYTHING this cool in the Heavenly Spheres, ever. Who wants to spend eternity praising Eru and singing songs, when we could go down into all that beauty?

I looked at Melkor, and could tell he was thinking the exact same thing.

Eru says, "This is your minstrelsy," which is Eru's two-dollar word for "singing," "and each of you shall find contained herein, amid the design that I set before you, all those things which it may seem that he himself devised or added."

And He turns to Melkor and says, "And thou, Melkor, wilt discover all the secret thoughts of thy mind, and wilt perceive that they are but a part of the whole and tributary to its glory."

Yeah sure, Eru. It's ALL you. What an egomaniac.

Then Eru waved His hand, and the Vision was gone! A bunch of us yelled out in dismay! Turns out Eru was just showing us what COULD be.

Great joke, Eru. You're a real peach. Show me something that finally gives meaning to my otherwise pointless existence, and then just take it away.

I'm beginning to think we need to do something about this guy.

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